Well, I'm back and I am happy to say that I am in a way better place than I have been in regards to starting a family. For those of you who aren't aware of what goes on in my day to day life, here are some highlights and low lights since my last post:
- February 2013: After a long battle, I lost my Aunt (dad's younger sister) to lung cancer. This was the first kick to our family and I don't care how much you prepare yourself for it, it still hurts like hell. But at the same time, my cousin and her husband adopted their daughter from China brought her home during all this and it makes me happy to know that LJ got to see her before she passed on. It was such a whirlwind of emotion, there is really no way to describe it.
- June 2013: I am not sure if I ever blogged about this in the past (and I am way too lazy to look it up - or maybe I just don't want to see what I wrote about it back then) but my dad was diagnosed with throat cancer and what we were told should have been an "easy thing for him to beat" and it eventually took his life in June. Pretty much it is all a blur to me but my husband and I were there when he passed away peacefully and even though I miss him more than words could ever express, I am so glad he is not in pain anymore.
- Summer 2013: Two new sweet babies have blessed my family and friends. My sister in law (SIL) and one of my best friends, M*, both had sweet little baby girls this past summer and I am happy that I am finally out of the "why not me" place and can just be a good "KK" to them both and spoil them along with their big brothers! I also found out one of my other best friends, S* is expecting her first baby! She is due in May and I am over the moon excited for her. More on that down the page though....
- November 2013: Another of of my best friends, L*, and I took part in the SUSAN G KOMEN 3 Day. This has always been on my bucket list and I am one very proud walker! It was seriously one of the best weekends of my life and we have vowed to walk it or crew it every year. We have already signed up for this November. I don't want to sound like one of those people who "drank the kool-aid" but it was one of the best, most inspiring weekends of my life! If you have ever wanted to do it, sign up! I am telling you, you will not regret it. Do what I did and go to a "Getting Started Meeting" and you will be all pumped to sign up. But just know that is nothing compared to the way you feel when you get to opening ceremonies, walk all that way, meet women who are survivors or walking in remembrance of a loved one and when you cross that finish line. I cannot tell you how many times we cried that weekend but we laughed and got horrible blisters and it was all worth it. The website is: Susan G. Komen 3 Day (note: Susan G Komen is not paying me to say this stuff, but maybe they should! - hahaha)
When S* told me she was pregnant it really lit a fire under my butt to get this adoption thing going. I have been in "mourning" over not getting pregnant on our own long enough. S* and I have been life long friends LITERALLY. Our dads lived down the street from each other when they married our moms. I am 6 months older than she is and her mom used to come to our house down the street to practice feeding me when she was pregnant with S*. This isn't "we met in 1st grade" type story. This is the REAL DEAL. She is not like a sister, she
IS my sister. All I kept thinking after she told me this was "I want her kid to be best friends with my kid" I know it may sound incredibly lame to some people but its the truth. Is it the only reason I want a child? Of course not! I wanted a kid long before but this was the catalyst to get me back in the game. Also, I am pretty stubborn and determined and knew one day we would have a child. Looking back, going through everything and it not working out, really has me to believe this was always in God's plan for us it just took a lot of time for me to realize it.
In case you were wondering why we are going the international route, we want a closed adoption. After everything we have been through, this gives us the most peace of mind. It's a personal decision and I hope everyone can respect that and understand. If not, ask us! We are more than happy to give you more insight into how we came to this decision.
We originally selected China or Bulgaria when we sent in our information. Last week I had a conference call with the reps from China and Taiwan (they offered so why not!?) and they gave me information on the types of children to come out of China and Taiwan. Brief explanation: Taiwan has children who have been abused or neglected; the children from China have more physical issues (heart murmur, cleft lip and pallet). We said we would go up to a three year old but from everything I read the youngest we could get would be 18 months) I never heard back from the rep from Bulgaria and after talking it over with Josh we are so excited to have selected China. We already know a few people who have adopted from there and we feel the most comfortable with dealing with Gladney here in the US. With Taiwan, we would deal with an agency over there and we aren't 100% comfortable with that. We originally had said either on the sex but when I let the Gladney rep know we chose China, we changed it to a little girl.
Our next step: we have another conference call with Gladney on Tuesday to give us more details of what to expect and to set up an orientation. Josh and I are both so excited to get the ball going. The estimated time should be 18 months if we don't hit any hiccups (fingers crossed) China or BUST!
