- That is a beautiful uterus
- Transfer Date
- Wanna be Kardashian on transfer day
- I am a googlin' fool
Friday, September 23, 2011
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
I know it doesn't work that way. It's not like God is sitting up there saying "I reached my limit of pregnancies this month, maybe next time Franklin". But in my crazy head, this is what I think occurs every time someone else I know pops up pregnant. I think "great, she is pregnant so that means I can't be" which is ludicrous!
OK Honesty time: When someone announces they are pregnant on Facebook, I become a psycho stalker for at least a day. I read everyone's congrats and comments (never commenting myself if person knows about our struggle to start a family because I do not want to draw attention to my infertile uterus). Then I go back and read past status updates looking for posts that imply pregnancy (ex: I am so tired or I have felt under the weather lately - these two always trip my pregnancy radar).
So just know if we are friends on Facebook and you are pregnant, I am totally stalking your page. Maybe if I read enough and look at enough ultrasound pics, it will rub off on me?
Thursday, September 15, 2011
- "How many days post transfer positive BFP"
- "5BB embryo IVF"
- "nausea after IVF"
- "Frozen cycle HPT"
The list is embarrasingly longer than this but I still have some dignity so you only get a sample of my googling subjects. Some people obsess over HPTs and buy tons of them only to hide them in drawers and under cabinets and quietly pee on when they are alone, hoping to see the second line. Luckily, I am not one of those (I am very cheap and don't want to waste the money on tests) but I am a secret google fool, which I know is even worse than peeing on a stick every morning. I have read every "what if" scenario out there and it doesn't make me feel any better or any worse. I HAVE TO STOP!!!! Gotta go, just realized I haven't googled "FET 31 year old 5bb embryo grade" - See I am crazy!!!
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Until my Dad calls Josh to tell him he bought a new TV and needs him to come over and help him. Josh and I are both VERY bad liars. Josh tells dad OK and starts to head over there, then calls me to tell me. (it is approximately 11AM at this point so I start to go into freak out mode) Josh calms me down and says he is going to unload the TV and then tell Dad he has to go to take me to the dentist b/c I have a toothache (which would explain why I was grouchy on Sunday when we were at their house - truth: I had just changed my estrogen patch that morning and it tends to put me on edge). Thank God they bought it! I was about to just give in and tell them what was going on b/c the sneaking around and hiding is too much for me at this point. But Josh took care of it and we were on our way and no one was the wiser.
So now we wait. My first blood test is Sept 22nd and then if that comes back positive, I will do another one to make sure numbers are rising, then a little later I will go in for sono to see heartbeat (you know the drill!) So I have been thinking lots of sticky thoughts and taking it easy. STICK STICK STICK!
Friday, September 9, 2011
- 10 years ago I was a bright eyed college student at the University of North Texas.
- 10 years ago my biggest worry was getting to class on time and what I was going to do on a Friday night.
- 10 years ago, I had not met my husband, I had never had a grown up job.
- 10 years ago I was innocent in so many ways.